David Spade acting like he’s embarrassed that’s hilarious
Former child actress and diplomat Shirley Temple Black has died at the age of 85. Here she is pictured with her daughter Lori Black, meeting the Beatles. Our sympathies go out to Lori and her family.
Lori was a bassist for the Melvins and dated frontman Buzz Osborne, who recounts his interactions with Shirley in my book Everybody Loves Our Town: An Oral History of Grunge:
BUZZ OSBORNE (Melvins singer/guitarist) When I went to San Francisco, I moved directly into Lori’s house. Now, bear in mind, I started going out with her long before I ever knew who her mom was. Months and months later, she said, “My mom is somebody famous.” I was like, “What are you fucking talking about?” It was crazy. I couldn’t believe that her mom was Shirley Temple.
Lori’s dad was Charles Black, who came from oil money, I think. And Shirley is a self-made woman. Shirley’s parents squandered every dime she ever made as a child before she had a chance to spend any of it. She got nothing. Zero. So she’s a pretty tough broad, you know? She’ll rip your head off and eat you for breakfast. She was the ambassador to Czechoslovakia at that point, after being the ambassador to Ghana.
Their house was unbelievable. Lots of stuff from the Hearst collection. Amazing shit—they had really great taste. And there was an Oscar sitting there. Shirley talked about her acting a lot. At one point they had her playing drums, and she had a recording of her playing drums when she was a kid, and she sounded like fucking Buddy Rich. And then she showed us how tap dancing is really just drumming. She tap-danced for us, and she was fucking amazing.
DALE CROVER (Melvins drummer) Shirley was like, “Yeah, my mom made me give away my drum set because it wasn’t ladylike to play drums.” I was like, “Oh, you couldn’t spread your legs with a dress to play drums. I get it.” She was sad about it.
The family was kind of weird and straight and conservative. Proper. I remember we’d line up outside the dining room and all kind of walk in together for some reason. I didn’t really understand it. But they were nice to me.
BUZZ OSBORNE They probably thought that I was some leeching weirdo and that their daughter went out with me just to screw with them. Her dad was never nice to me. Shirley was nice to me to some degree, but they’re very guarded people. I’m sure they thought I was going to write some book or something. And believe me, without going into any graphic details, there are massive skeletons in that closet.
One thing that Shirley said to me was, “Working in the government, you can always get somebody audited.” I took that to heart. They never did anything to me personally, or even threatened me, but they didn’t need to. You don’t need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows. They were über-right-wing. Now, I’m not talking about Rush Limbaugh; I’m talking about the people who make life-and-death decisions. And it’s not necessarily evil; it’s more realistic. Charles was ex-CIA. It’s weirder than you can possibly imagine. I certainly never got the truth.
Since then, everything that’s happened—from Nirvana going crazy and on and on and on—none of that holds a candle to how weird that situation was. That’s David Lynch weird.
This is cool.
"Nah son I don’t do … Russia."
- Curling Cat when asked about if he was competing in Sochi
Bardstown has the Kentucky Bourbon Festival. Now, Louisville has the Bourbon Classic.
The Classic, touted as “a connoisseur’s weekend celebrating all things bourbon” and intended to become an annual event, will debut March 22-23, 2013, at the Kentucky Center for the Arts and will feature a…
Guess who’s going to THIS tomorrow? THIS GUY
Earlier this week I posted video of barrels being charred at the Brown-Forman Cooperage in Louisville, where barrels for each B-F product are made to specification. Today I thought I’d share a few more images from my tour there last week. The place is running at capacity, with a second…
Hey, y’all. Sorry I haven’t posted in a while. I’m sure you’ve noticed!
Since the second baby was born, I’ve been busy. Running your own law practice, trying to handle two kids, two dogs (we adopted a puppy from Kentucky Humane Society back in November), being on a few local boards and committees keeps me busy enough. Then, I did the probably foolish thing of joining a few guys and starting The Coopers, a pro soccer supporters club in Louisville.
In the few months since The Coopers were founded, it’s been a whirlwind. Exploding membership, season ticket pledges, merchandise, local (and some national) media attention, capped off by a visit from the leadership from Orlando City Soccer Club last week - it’s a lot to take in. I’ve had nothing short of a blast being a part of it all.
But I’m taking a moment to reflect. I’ve always spent a lot of time reading about sports on the internet, talking about sports, watching sports. None of this is particularly productive. It doesn’t make me money, it doesn’t make me more attentive to my family. There are times when I feel bad about spending so much time and expending so much energy over something that is so superfluous in the grand scheme of things.
I guess I do these things because sports appeal to me emotionally. I find sports interesting. Know what I don’t find interesting? Updates to the Kentucky Revised Statutes. I like being a lawyer. I like the law. I love sports. The law is important. Sports are stupid.
But are they? If one considers sports to be a part of a place’s cultural fabric and identity, maybe they’re just as important as art, music, theater, and the like. These are all things that may not serve as the building blocks of society, but they make life worth living. (I admit I sort of paraphrased the most recent iPad commercial on that bit, but it seemed apropos.)
I’m not going to stop being a lawyer (unless someone offers me six figures to do something I find attractive without having to leave Jefferson County, which I doubt). I’m not going to stop loving sports. My aims with the Coopers and bringing pro soccer to Louisville aren’t all about creating something for my family to do during the summer. Some of it is about civic pride - sports teams do provide a focal point for citizens to hang their identity on, right or wrong. Some of it is about bringing a game that appeals to the world to the less-fortunate parts of Louisville - The Coopers have made a point of having a charity arm that serves Portland and the West End.
These are all good things that have value. I’m glad to be a part of it. I suppose just need to make a point of making sure I’ve properly prioritized my life. I have a tendency to over-commit myself. But there’s no doubt that my most important commitments are to God and my family. The law, sports, music…that stuff must wait.
RIP: Nelson Mandela (1918-2013)
Photo by Ian Berry, South Africa, 1994.
These are the heroes of our generation.
tbh these are stupid reasons like omfg if the people in my school did this the teachers were probably laugh their ass off and join us
"In the future, Alex would be better off simply accepting my teachings without resistance." what
That teacher sounds like a future dictator someone needs to hit her over the head with a dystopian novel
Can we please talk about the fact a kid said he was jesus crist and was throwing bibles at people?! hes my hero.
Y’all. Lots has been happening. Not personally, that stuff’s going fine. Not business stuff, either; that’s going fine, too. No, I’m talking about soccer stuff and basketball stuff.
Soccer stuff first: three other guys and I started a supporters club for a professional soccer club, ANY CLUB, here in Louisville. We’ve decided to call ourselves the Coopers, explanation being that bourbon barrels are an important part of how bourbon is made, even if it’s not the star of the show. It’s fun. You get it. Coopers!
Our next plan is to get a Facebook (I know, lame, but also useful), Twitter, and independent webpages up and running to grow the group. The bigger the group gets, the more potential interest in season tickets for this as-yet-non-existent soccer club to sell to its owners and the Metro Council. I’m also hoping to start a podcast that would run bi-weekly about local soccer. Seeing as most local soccer means college and high school, it probably wouldn’t be a very long pod, but I think podcasts are fun and want to do one.
This leads me to kind of a big question. I’ve been posting stuff on my blog, SBNation comments, and Twitter as Anything but Gatorade (duh) for like five years now. Since I want to use what little media power I have behind this brand (ha) to support the soccer effort, it’s probably best to finally use my real name, right? At least I think so. Tough call. Any input anyone wants to add would be appreciated.
Finally: college basketball. It’s coming. Big Blue Madness is TOMORROW NIGHT, y’all. I CAN’T WAIT. The stump speech from Coach Cal. The always over the top player introductions. I have no idea what the new guys look like, so those are helpful. The dunk contest masquerading as a scrimmage. The actual dunk contest. Matthew Mitchell dance party. I love it. What I don’t love, though, is how local TV, Dave Baker, and Rob Bromley take a slick, state of the art event and make it feel like something from the 80s. Get some new blood in there that makes the event exciting. Rob Bromley could make a rave boring.
The actual season isn’t far away. Kentucky’s gonna be really good. Let’s get after it. GO CATS.